How to mow it the right way
Spring is sprung, the grass is rizz, do you know what the ordinance is?
Amazing what a really good rain will do, isn't it? There are blooms everywhere, the red bud trees are budding, the wheat looks healthy, and the lawns are green and growing. It is about time!
I am waiting to see what the bucket of poo-poo that the nice elf left at Christmas will do for my yard and garden after the rain. If it makes tons of lush green grass and healthy blooming flowers I will be thrilled. Luckily, I don't have to mow the lush green grass. The mister and our dog, Satchmo, have dibs on that project. The mister drives the mower and Satchmo sits beside him and tells him how it ought to be done.
Being the smart dog that she is, Satchmo knows that the mister is not allowed to spew grass clippings into the gutter and street in front of our house or our warehouse. Apparently she reminds him of this. He swears up and down that they communicate about such things. I don't even want to know.
None-the-less, someone on that mower seat is aware of the ordinance the city has pertaining to where grass clippings are allowed to be at the end of a mowing session. The gutter area and street are not the place. You need to aim them back into your yard. Did you hear me? YOU NEED TO AIM YOUR GRASS CLIPPINGS BACK INTO YOUR YARD RATHER THAN AIMING THEM AT THE STREET!
Okay, the shouting is done.
The reason you shouldn't blow grass clippings into the street is because they clog the storm drains. That just makes life more difficult for the city workers and all the rest of us who expect the drains to carry water away from our homes during a heavy downpour.
Your clippings are small and biodegradable
That "sludge" part is still not enough to convince you that you should cooperate? Here is what the ordinance says. "It shall be unlawful for any person or persons to place, throw or deposit or caused to be placed, deposited or left any dirt, filth, sweepings, excrement, compost, papers, boxes, ashes, lumber, coal, wood, kindling, GRASS, weeds, leaves, slops, or litter of any kind in or on any streets, alleys, parks, or public ways of the city." Sounds like that ordinance has been around a long time. When was the last time you thought about what to do with your slops, ashes, or coal?
But here is a modern twist on the rule. The fine for depositing your grass clippings (or coal or slops) in the street is pretty steep. Upon conviction, the person violating this ordinance "shall be fined any sum not exceeding One Hundred Dollars ($100.00), or be imprisoned not to exceed thirty (30) days, or be both so fined and imprisoned." Now that looks like a fun deal! And then of course, you get to pay court costs on top of all of that.
Interested in seeing if the ordinance really works? Just keep blowing that grass into the gutter. If Satchmo can figure this out, surely you can, too. Don't be a schlep; do the right thing.
— SUSAN MARSHALL
